The Haters FAQ

It is time again. Once every year I take a moment that I dedicate to special people. The haters and the dummies.

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"So you rode your Vespa over the ocean or is it a submarine scooter?"+

"Is that a girl’s bike?"+

"How did you afford that? Are you a millionaire?"+

"Why is it that packed?"+

"How did you get so many holidays?"+

"Does your butt hurt now?"+

"Does it count if you did not see all continents?"+

"Why did you rush so much and not enjoy?"+

"Why?"+

"Scooters are ugly and gay."+

"This reminds me of Long Way Round."+

"Will there be a movie?"+

"Did you have a favourite place?"+

"It was not long enough — it does not count."+

"Do you think you are special now?"+

"Why did you not go with a bicycle?"+

"It is easy for you because you are famous and everybody knows you!"+

What I Am. And What I Am Not.

I am a Vespa adventure rider. Not a politician. Not a religious leader. Not a prophet. Not a salesman. Not a lawyer. Not your mum.

I post because I think what I do is pretty cool — riding to places on small old Vespas where usually only big bikes with all the bling go, in a 20-year-old leather jacket, 100,000 km boots, and an open-face helmet through storms and heat and everything in between. I do not sell you anything. I do not need your vote.

Yes, I think the Vespa is cooler than any other bike and requires more skill. Yes, I think what I do is pretty impressive. If I decide to say so and you do not like it — I invite you to go find something cooler and report back.

I block fast. This is my hobby, not my job. Have a nice weekend, and wherever you are: stay safe.

Up next — some sunsets from somewhere on the planet. No puppies, sorry.

A Word From Markus

I admit sometimes I get triggered. I do not like rich influencers who "buy adventure". Guys who send scooters around the planet to ride a bit and then publish 3 books about a handful of km — because even though they already have money they also want to be famous now.

I am not an influencer, I am not rich, I am not a blogger and I do not think I am better than others. I ONLY WANT TO RIDE!

I started with mini budgets and a heartbreak and still keep it real after 12 years of riding. If you wanna do the same — that is cool — but then better start now and leave the big wallet at home and get ready for nights in bus stops, behind gas stations or somewhere in the wild.

Stay healthy and happy. Make kilometers and memories.

Love, Markus

Ready for the real stuff?

See the Adventures → · Read the Books → · Book Markus to Speak →